There is a way back to this bliss, and as my heart began to open this year, I felt compelled to share what I've learned (and where I've stumbled) in a new book. It is not fractured, it is not broken, it is not destroyed. Our inner world is damaged, and it distracts us with a never-ending quest for external solutions.īut I keep putting "disconnected" in quotes because the true self didn't actually go anywhere. And when we're "disconnected" from this source, we're bound to struggle over and over again.
Throughout the course of life, certain events "disconnect" us from that source - childhood traumas, difficult relationships, rejection from loved ones, it really could be anything. I think there is a part in all of us that feels love and joy for no particular reason - the life energy that surges through our bodies - allowing us to feel light, free, humorous, grateful, whole. One of the most frequent phrases I hear from readers is: “I miss my old self.” As if the old self has gone away.
In these cases, time does not seem to heal all wounds. Identity and personality become shaky constructs, kept afloat by external measures of worth. Love becomes conditional, waiting for others to show their cards before we show our own. Instead, a protective part of ourselves has taken control, to ensure this pain never happens again. We may struggle to trust ourselves, fall in love, or experience genuine happiness. The list goes on, and it's unique to every individual. Trauma often manifests as strange sensations in the body: numbness, tightness, emptiness, voids, hollowness, tension, blockages, agitation.Īlong with these mysterious feelings, there tend to be a bunch of psychological and behavioral changes too: people-pleasing, self-doubt, fatigue, accomplishing, perfectionism, mood swings, isolation, over analysis, insomnia, rejection, depression, guilt, excessive daydreaming, irritability, jealousy, inadequacy, worthlessness, need for control, resentment, paranoia, rumination, care-taking, substance abuse. All day, every day, from the moment I woke up to the second I fell asleep.
It wasn’t painful or sharp, just a constant numb squeezing sensation. I am so excited to share this book with the world, and I am beyond grateful for all of the friends and professionals who made it a reality.Īt the end of my last book, I described a “tight feeling in my heart”. Or in major bookstores everywhere, like Barnes & NobleĪnd here is the cover design, from the awesome design team at TarcherPerigee (Penguin Random House) You can find it today on Amazon (Paperback and Kindle):
I'm so excited to announce that Whole Again is now published!
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